Taking a Time Out

I hate wasting time.  So for me justifying mediation became changing my initial mindset of meditation.

Step 1.  Meditation isn't doing nothing

As the years have progressed I've definitely seen how balance can impact people.  The first being emotional balance.  We all have ups and downs and sometimes those ups and downs feel more dramatic because of what is going on.  Relative perception.  So I'm taking meditation as a balance for my very active mind.  A deeper control over not only my emotions but also my thought processing.  

Step 2.  Baby steps

Hmmm.  So typical me didn't just dive straight into meditation.  I instead started with guided relaxation.  I must say youtube has a myriad of videos for this too.  If anyone is looking for a little help calming down.  I highly recommend youtube.  While some of them can be quite over the top - expressing how these are all your actions and you are the one making the choices, I still found the bulk of them pretty impactful.  A word of advice for anyone making these videos, I realize these are my actions and my choices...that is the point of guided...you are providing me the steps....just provide the steps...don't tell me it is me...I know

I have completed around four guided relaxation sessions.  So far I feel much less stress and I've been able to focus a little better and get a bit more done.  Just as a note my room is still a disaster.  My computer and the people on the other end are a huge distraction. #priorities

Step 3. Learning about meditation

I'm using this site to learn about meditation and how/why it works:  http://www.how-to-meditate.org

What I've learned so far:

• This is much more involved than I originally thought.
• Perhaps I drink too much coffee to effectively meditate.
• I really should read through the website and actually go through with this meditation thing.

OK For real, after I finished my coffee I did actually read the site and I think my plan of action is going to be.....

There are a few things I should pay attention to while meditating:

• Pay attention to posture - good posture supports good breathing
• Pay attention to breath - don't want stinky breath j/k.  Breath appears to be a fundamental part of certain types of meditation.  In fact it is the focus.
• Pay attention to comfort - Being comfortable makes it easier to focus and let go. 

I still haven't tried to meditate yet.  It is like meditation is my sick best friend and although I love her she is really sick right now - I don't want to get sick and while I keep remotely talking to her and checking in to make sure she is ok and doesn't need anything, I'm actually quite scared.  I think I have a fear of greatness.  Part of me self sabotages all the time.

Step 4.  OK time to meditate

As every Nike commercial from as far back as I can remember has told me....Just do it.  Ok Nike I'm going to do it.  This blog entry has been in draft form for at least two weeks now....lol...I'm not quite sure if I will ever actually meditate...

+1 more day and I still haven't meditated - in fact I'm very sleep deprived.  Last night I not only went to sleep really late, but I also had crazy dreams so my sleep was really bad.  If there were a point where meditation could help me, it'd be right now.  I'm not doing anything I should do, but rather just following my passions and desires.

+1 week at this point still haven't meditated - I am now in Oregon - my happy place.  It is so amazingly beautiful here and very calming.  I should really go up a mountain and just take in nature and practice breathing.  I'm sure it would be enlightening.  It is also Halloween.

I can feel it in my bones Nov 1st.  It is happening.

I did it!  I was at the base camp of a hiking trail in South America.  I was tired of reading so I meditated.  Sitting under the tree I just embraced the here and now.  I listened to my breath and felt incredibly relaxed afterwards.

I found it incredibly difficult to focus on my breath.  My mind does not stop easily (Even in one of the most peaceful quiet places on earth)  It is something I'd like to practice.  I will get there.

The benefits when I thought about it could be profound.  I really feel like I could reach entirely new levels if I could actually hone my focus.  I even considered the possibility of training with monks.  They are the pros right?  If you can focus completely on one thing the power you could put behind it is intense.  No adderall required.